13:47 Lessons

But over the years, especially after my mother’s health deteriorated after she suffered a stroke, my father was the one who took care of her. She clearly indicated she preferred my father’s care to that of the doctors’, in itself a revelation of the quality of his care.

He remembers her complicated regime of medications. Because she cannot see on the left side of her visual field, he sits on her left during meals. He prompts her to eat the food on the left side of her plate and picks up whatever food her left hand drops on the table.

I have always admired my father for his dedication to Singapore, his determination to do what is right, his courage in standing up to foreigners who try to tell us how to run our country.But my father was also the eldest son in a typical Peranakan family. He cannot even crack a soft-boiled egg - such things not being expected of men, especially eldest sons, in Peranakan families.But when my mother’s health deteriorated, he readily adjusted his lifestyle to accommodate her, took care of her medications and lived his life around her. I knew how much effort it took him to do all this, and I was surprised that he was able to make the effort.

I had goosebumps when I read this.
I would have admired the man in the story had he been any Tom, Dick or Harry.
Oh wait a minute, Harry?
He's the man she described.
She- Dr. Lee Wei Ling, the daughter of Singapore's Minister Mentor Mr Lee Kuan Yew.

 Such is love.

Recently, my dad is not in his best form.
And I see how my mom cares for him.
They might not be 'lovey dovey'; heck, sometimes I myself wonder what is sustaining their marriage, but through this ordeal, I think I'm beginning to see what it takes for a marriage to work.

Not flowers, romantic candlelight dinners or proclamation of 'I love you's...
It's more about being there for each other, to care and comfort each other even in their worst form and especially when they are in their worst form.

Thanks for yet another lesson on life.